Jamie Oliver “quick” chocolate brownies

I put the “quick” in quotes here because I’m not sure enitrely what makes them quick. Probably it’s just that you stick everything in the food processor and wazz it all up. The book says “whiz” with one z. have we been mis-hearing Jamie the whole time? Was he always saying “whiz”, not “wazz”? Shouldn’t “whizz” have twos zs? (none of these questions will be answered in this post).

I have made these brownies (approximately anyway, I never quite follow the instructions) a few times before and could not remember which book the recipe was in. I was almost convinced that I had written about them before, but a search of this blog didn’t bring up any brownies. FYI, it’s “30 minute meals”.

I don't want to make the rest of these things

I don’t want to make the rest of these things

Unlike many of the recipes in 30 minute meals, this one actually contains real timings. Not just “once you’ve done the blah blah to the duck, it’ll be time to do the thingy with the rice”. That’s good, because I don’t always MAKE every single item. In this case the savoury course is scallops. No thank you. Other than that I have no beef with 30 minute meals. Of course it doesn’t take you 30 minutes the first time you make it – what did you expect? But if you have a boiled kettle, a heated-up oven, you have practised your knife skills and you don’t have to check the book every single step, you could make this food in not a lot more than 30 minutes.

Not precisely what's requested I know, but these will do

Not precisely what’s requested I know, but these will do

Put the oven on to 180C. Get out your food processor. Has that taken 10 of your 30 minutes? Don’t worry about it. You’re not making a TV show and nobody is going to put Hollyoaks on before you’re done if you are not on time. Stick in 200g dark chocolate (broken up a bit), 250g (that’s a whole block) of butter, 200g of sugar. I used salted butter in everything, and I had white granulated sugar instead of golden caster sugar. You’ve got 200g of chocolate here, you’re not going to notice golden vs white sugar. Wazz it up.

Add 6 level tablespoons (or 6 heaped dessert spooons if you don’t have any tablespoons) of cocoa powder, 4 heaped tablespoons (or 6 heaped dessert spooons again) of self raising flour, a pinch of salt if you used unsalted butter (do you see how pointless that was?). Wazz some more. Add 4 eggs while the motor on the machine is running, or just turn it off, crack them in, and then wazz some more, because nothing bad will happen if you do it that way round.

Wazzzzzzzz until it’s all combined and smooth and looks a bit like dark brown cake mix. Jamie says you want to have crystallised ginger and pecans and sour dried cherries. I say use whatever you have around, or whatever took your fancy at the shop. I’ve got walnuts today. I have in the past used the booze-soaked cherries that result from making cherry vodka.

Get some greasproof paper – in this you must not deviate from Jamie’s instructions, although I daresay tinfoil would do – scrunch it under the tap to get it damp – and use it to line a tin. I’ve used a normal square cake tin before and ended up with tasty yet heavy bricks of brownies. Look at the tin below – it’s basically a roasting tin. Nice and big so the brownie is quite thin (another reason this is “quick”, I suppose). Put a bit of oil on. Ideally oil that doesn’t taste of anything – this is not the point for the extra virgin.

Smooth it out - it's not very tall but it will rise (even if there's only a few spoons of flour)

Smooth it out – it’s not very tall but it will rise (even if there’s only a few spoons of flour)

Put your brownie mix in your tin, grate over some orange zest if you like. Put in oven. Wait “12-14” minutes. Test with a knife. It’s not even slightly cooked. Wait some more. Brownies are supposed to be gooey so you don’t need the proper “skewer comes out clean” cooked-ness that a sponge needs. You’ll know when it’s done. When it is done, take it out of the oven. Don’t look at the clock – it’s been wya over 30 minutes – but who cares, you have brownies.

Try to wait for them to cool before you eat them

Try to wait for them to cool before you eat them


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